Quick Rejoinders to Atheist One Liners

If God created everything, who created God?

–> If I’m driving a car, who is driving me?

We’re all atheists about 10’s of thousands of gods out there. Atheists just take it one god further.

–> we’re all vegan when it comes to most meat. Vegans just take it once step further.

God says everyone has to worship him for all eternity. What kind of self-centered egomaniac demands that?

–> Parents demand that children don’t stick forks into electrical sockets. What kind of egomaniac demands control of their kids like that?

What happens to the billions of people who never even hear of your path to salvation? How is sending them to hell for all eternity merciful or just when they have no choice in the matter?

مَّنِ ٱهْتَدَىٰ فَإِنَّمَا يَهْتَدِى لِنَفْسِهِۦ ۖ وَمَن ضَلَّ فَإِنَّمَا يَضِلُّ عَلَيْهَا ۚ وَلَا تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌۭ وِزْرَ أُخْرَىٰ ۗ وَمَا كُنَّا مُعَذِّبِينَ حَتَّىٰ نَبْعَثَ رَسُولًۭا

–> “Whosoever is rightly guided is only rightly guided for
the sake of his own soul, and whosoever is astray is only astray to its
detriment. None shall bear the burden of another. And never do We
punish till We have sent a messenger.” (Quran 17:15)

Which is more likely, that Mary conceived as a virgin, or that Joseph knocked her up. Billions of people have gotten pregnant the old fashioned way—which is more likely here?

–> Which is more likely, that 1078 atoms just popped out of nowhere and happen to act in a regulated pattern, or that a few billion atoms in the form of a zygote popped out of nowhere?

You hold roughly the same religious beliefs as your parents and your country. So does 99% of everyone else in every other religion. What’s more likely, that yours is the one true religion, or that we all just get brainwashed into our parents belief system?

–> You hold roughly the same worldview as the majority of professors in your country. So does 99% of everyone else in every other region. What’s more likely, that yours is the one true worldview, or that we all just get brainwashed into our school system’s belief system?

As an atheist, I’m just like you—I’m kind to others, I love my family, I continually try to be a better person. I just don’t need the threat of hell or promise of heaven to do it.

–> Right, you just need a) social conditioning b) an ingrained biological structure predisposing you to moral thinking and tribal thinking c) the threat of jail d) the rewards of being a functional member of a social group e) the gratification of your own ego for thinking you’re a good person f) the gratification of your ego for getting outraged at others g) an entirely revised definition of morality that cuts out half of your obligations to God, man, and creation.

As an atheist, I am amazed at the wonder of nature and the universe on their own merits. I don’t need to believe there is some sky daddy at the bottom of it to reach this conclusion.

–> I am amazed at the wonder of the smart phone and the automobile on their own merits. I don’t need to believe their are entire teams of people and factories at the bottom of it to reach this conclusion.

As an atheist, I agree that it is not enough to just say what you’re against. That’s why I am also a Secular Humanist. Other atheists may hold different positive views, but we are more than just anti-religious.

–> Please provide the evidence that Secular Humanism is true.

As an atheist, I enjoy sex to its fullest. Particularly in my single years! As long as everyone consents, then I don’t have to worry about the opinion of a god or his threats to my eternal disposition.

–> As an atheist, I enjoy sex to its fullest. Particularly in my single years! Especially if the other person doesn’t consent, but I’m not caught, then I don’t have to worry about the opinion of people or their threats to my freedom.